Bad Moms Club

Dazed and Confused

Being once a teenage girl myself I assumed raising them would be fairly easy. I remember what it was like. I remember the rules, the frustration, the crazy hormones. So this whole teen thing should be a walk in the park. As I’ve mentioned before I have two teen girls. My oldest (18) is off conquering the world and in University. My youngest daughter is 15 going on 35 and knows all the answers. What I thought was going to be a walk in the park turned out more like a stroll through the thorns. Personally I have held on to a lot of guilt given how the girls father and I parted ways. Because of this guilt I trie to give the girls all they wanted and I am sure this didn’t do their attitudes any justice. There are days I just want to pull my hair out. How do you deal with someone who thinks they know everything especially when that someone is your 15 year old daughter and has zero life experience but insists they have the answer to everything! I have encouraged my girls to express themselves and have always tried to listen to their opinion and take it into consideration. What they think and feel does matter……. Is this why they feel what they say goes? Is this why when they ask a question, I give an answer and in return I get told my answer is incorrect and this is how it really is……LMFAO well let me ask you this, If they already knew the answer wtf are they asking me in the first place? I love my girls to the ends of the earth and beyond, but there are rough days just as there are wonderful days. The thing I have trouble handling is the attitude and depression. The low self esteem my youngest seems to struggle with and I have no idea why. As i said I have always listened, been open, honest and made sure they know how proud I am of them. Yet at 15 my daughter is constantly putting herself down whether it be body image or intelligence she struggles everyday. I myself have mental illness so I know what it can be like. I just tried so hard to keep them protected from that and hoped it wasn’t something that was passed on to the next generations. I’ve sent her for counseling, I’ve encouraged her, I’ve done research and have tried all I know of to turn her negative attitude around. I am completely dazed and confused and in need of assistance. I really don’t want my daughter to follow me down my rabbit hole. Such a smart, beautiful girl her life is full of opportunities. The question of the day is How do you make a 15 year old girl see that potential when she has closed herself off to any positive reinforcement?

Bad Moms Club

Dating Double Standards

It’s hard to believe that in this day and age dating double standards still exist. I am a 41 year old woman and my husband is 25 years old. Personally I have no issue with this, my children have no issue with our marriage nor does my ex husband. I’m also lucky enough to say that most of my family are on board also as long as he makes me happy (which he does). Unfortunately this fact isn’t true for everyone. Many people in society still believe I am doing something wrong. They pass judgement without knowing our story. We get remarks, stares and questions as to whether or not I am his mother. What bothers me about this is that not long ago I dated a man that was 14 almost 15 years my senior and we received none of this prosecution. In fact no one blinked an eye. He was not called a cougar or a cradle robber. When other men found out how much younger I was they gave out high fives not glares. Is this fair? Is this considered whats right nowadays? We love each other, we are happy and we make each other happy. Since I first met him years ago I felt drawn to him. It took a long time for us to reach a time in our lives where we both wanted the same thing at the same time. Where we both decided to let go of fears holding us back and take a leap into the unknown. Honestly the greatest choice I have ever made. So I ask you does that sound wrong to you? Does our relationship sound fake? Does it sound like this man is just my F***Boy? Take Johnny Depp he is like 22 years older than Amber Heard and that wasn’t a huge factor at any point. The public didn’t even bat an eye…….Why? Because its Johnny or because he is a man? It’s 2022 with all the things that a re considered normal now I find it hard to believe that a woman being older than her mate is such a hot topic yet here we are. Talked about in grocery stores, movie theaters, eateries you name it we receive the stares. When I’m showing apartments and I introduce my husband and get asked if I’m a cougar!!!! Yes, there is STILL A DOUBLE STANDARD and in my opinion it’s just not right. I hope after reading this you take note of yourself and perhaps realize I am right.

A relationship is about making the person you love happy, making them feel safe, secure and trusted. M opinion is no matter sex, color or age as long as you make each other feel loved than nothing else should matter. I know I love my man, I know he makes me happy and that I see love in his eyes each day when he looks at me. Making me feel safe and secure. If this mum with attitude opinion counts for anything I believe as long as your partner makes YOU happy it doesn’t matter sex, color or age what matters is the ove they give.

Bad Moms Club

Where Does the Time Go?

Sometimes I look at pictures of my girls seeing them through the ages and wonder to myself “Where does the time go?” seems like just yesterday they were my little girls. One hiding behind my leg the other never leaving my side. My oldest was always so shy. One of those kids that constantly said she had “no friends” or “no one likes me” yet I’d drop her at school and kids would call out her name “Sarah, they are calling you” I’d say. Her response 9 times out of 10 was “i know” and she would actually ignore them LMFAO. She has always gone to the beat of her own drum……I look at her now and see a woman. Out on her own, university student truly a mothers dream. Where did the time go? Where did my shy little girl go? Who is this woman who stands before me? My youngest has always been a mums girl since the day she came out she has been my suck. In that respect not much has changed LOL. The mouth on her although drives me crazy also makes me proud to see her stand up for her opinions even if they do seem far fetched. Time has been pretty good to me so I really can’t complain……But that doesn’t stop m mind from wandering Where did the time go? Life happens so fast,

Bad Moms Club

When’s the Cut Off?

So I’ve been asking myself lately, when is it enough? At what age do we cut off our children? Do we ever really? I mean I know my mom has still bailed me out from time to time ( and no not literally). I bring this topic up because my eldest daughter has once again asked for money ( and I’m not talking pocket change). She went off to university last year and decided to stay for summer and not come home like her friends. Six girls have rented a house for the school year and my Sarah decided to live there all year. Lets keep in my mind she works full time as waitress during summer. I pay her car insurance and her phone bill still……YES you read that correctly and her gram and I paid for her rent this past 6 months. Which we gave her in a lump sum to pay her portion of rent each month. Her cat needed vet I paid 400 and my mom 800, Sarah paid…. I’m sure you guessed it ZERO. She thanked vet and techs on Facebook and not one thank you to her gram or I. The point to all this ramble is she pays very little and went away on vacay with her dad etc…..she tells me OSAP hasn’t paid for her summer course yet but that she needs money for something. I tell her to use rent money and put it back when OSAP comes. She semi complains and gives excuses but I stuck to it……She returns gets a small pay and tells me she has no food in house and has utilities to pay and wants money she paid out until OSAP comes. HMMMMMM this makes me start thinking. What about the rent money? If she had that to use like I said she would still have money left as we paid until OCT. Unless of course she spent and thats why she had to use her own funds. Even if that’s true. Is she not saving working all those hours. What is she doing with her money? So I ask myself when is it enough? When do you say NO? As a mum when a child says they need food it makes it difficult to say no when they aren’t close enough to bring dinner. So when do I cut her off?

Bad Moms Club

Am I Raising A Teen Or A Pig?

My boyfriend and I have spent the last 4 days redoing bedrooms. My oldest daughter has gone off to university. The girls no longer need the larger room and my younger daughter was excited for the change. Make it her own space. My youngest however is a bit of a slob…..Yes I ralize the girl is 15 but honestly if you had seen what I did you would know what I mean, The child is disgudting. What’s worse is a lot of my boxes were in that room. Omg I have not seen anything like it. Old food containers, take out, drinks in take away cups sitting around creating fruit fies etc…… She literally has a circle of items around her on the bed and all over the room. I feel like I’m raising some sort of live stock. Like all parents I’ve tried all the tactics. The grounding, the taking away of prized possessions, reward program, you name I’ve tried it and guess what oink oink the place is a sty.

Bad Moms Club

Being a Bad Mom

Being a mom can be hard. Run here, do this, grab that. So often I feel like I’m being pulled from all directions. I decided long ago I was going to be a “do as I say, not as I do” attitude. I’m the parent right? I refuse to be one of those moms held hostage by my own child. My children to this day even now being teens are just a little afraid of me. That’s the way it should be. For this reason I have never really had to dole out spankings etc. My children just behaved.